I quit

from by sandy bell

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self hatred and despair.... another form of leaving...


as she tears her dress into a thousand pieces
she says
this life is too unbearable. it’s terrible.
i quit.
i’m tired of all this searching and rehearsing
for sin.
can’t make sense of what it means to be a lady
i quit

and everywhere she goes
she finds the coldest stone
and puts it in her purse
should things get much worse
she’ll have this heavy thing
and maybe make a ring
wear it to the party
that celebrates the end
of everything

so she calls him to her bedroom
says come soon
and fix
this light
it’s killing my eyes
any my lies need a hit


she says she’s as reliable
as this old bible on her bed
if only he’d open up to her
like the holy word
she’d give in
but some things can’t be trusted
and you’re one of them
and so she hits
herself with all his anger
but the danger is when she quits


from When i Leave ohio, released January 1, 2014
guitar and vocal: sandy bell
upright bass: richard hammond
synthesisers, drums and percussion: jeff lipstein
violin: olivier manchon, maxim moston and joan wasser
violas: olivier manchon and david creswell
cello: noah hoffeld
harmonies: alice bierhorst



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sandy bell Woodstock, New York

Sandy Bell is a songwriter, singer and musician who currently calls Woodstock, NY home. She has moved through a vibrant and textured musical constellation, playing most notably with the brilliant Jeff Buckley, and most recently, contributing background vocals on the 2016 ‘Bat for Lashes’ album. Sandy’s music is an expressionistic, lush transmutation of deep grief into powerful songs. ... more

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